Did you all have a good Easter weekend?
The UK had a four day weekend, as Friday and Monday were both bank holidays. Mine was actually decent. It consisted of; a podcast recording with my pals, Jonah and Martin, a walk/run through the local regional park, Topgolf, an Easter fair, a night out and an erratic urge to slit my own throat.
Yeah, you read correctly. I still get these thoughts however rarely… even after good-vibe times. I suspect it’s because I don’t want to return the norm, the fake reality we all live in. The alcohol doesn’t help, but I’d be lying if it wasn’t something that fleetingly sweeps through my mind, occasionally when sober. This blog is a written description or pathway to my schemes of adventure and freedom, and it’s only fair that I share the lack of positivity I experience at infrequent intervals. Sometimes I just get bored of bullshit.
Strangely the next day after that episode, I had a spring in my step. I still have that spring in my step and I have started working out and I have restricted the freedom of my diet again. Although I was keeping to my majority meat diet, the sugar cravings were strong and I found myself snacking sweet items, more than once in a day.
The moment of depression experienced is incredibly hard to explain. You could receive the most positive news in the world however, it won’t change your mindset there and then. When you fall into the pit of despair, there are really only a few things you can do. A few solutions are; working out if you somehow summon the strength, sapped by your mentality, sleep through it, or Meditate. If anyone has any other ideas, please feel free to share. I suppose what they all point to, is just simply moving on. Just divert your attention to something else.
My podcast, although delayed, will be released soon, and depression is a topic that has been brushed across in the first few episodes already. I aim to have five pre-recorded, before recording and simultaneously publishing, to provide myself time to upload weekly. They’re not all negative, in fact, they are all very positive however, we need to note/accept the negative times to appreciate the positive times. The first episode looks like it’ll be posted on 01/06/19 now. I will keep you all posted!