In my previous post, albeit short, I mentioned escaping the UK once again. Laura gave me sanction whilst I looked for working opportunities. I found a cool urban garden in the heart of Leipzig, Germany. The hosts needed someone to house-sit whilst they took their annual two-week vacation… and they were also harvesting honey soon… My path was therefore laid out before me.
6th July 2020
The hosts seem talented in music and seem to have powerful networking. They also appear quite wealthy. It’ll be an interesting stay I’m sure.
We had a barbeque last night and my first task was to take the marijuana plants that were hidden from guests the night before and put them back into their rightful spot in the garden.
7th July 2020
I’ve started my wake up routine again, though it’s going to take a few days to create the autonomous habits again.
The hosts and I went on a bike ride yesterday evening and went to the pub for a couple of beers.
My stomach doesn’t feel great. I haven’t been kind to it in recent days. I consumed far too much sugar and alcohol whilst staying with Laura.
Though, I don’t think I’ve treated my stomach well over the last three months in fairness.
I’ve messaged a few people on apps, such as Tinder or Couchsurfing, but I really should muster the energy to explore on my own.
8th July 2020
Sleep pattern is still fucked.
The bedroom is very hot at night and the street is very noisy.
I need to start setting incentives that only I can complete as every incentive I have set since my morning routine which relies on someone else has failed.
10th July 2020
Yesterday was a write off.
I didn’t drink much the night before, but I found the non-stop drinking/partying mentality frustrating.
I’m also becoming concerned with the lack of work I’m doing around the house.
I spoke to the host this morning, but he seems pretty chill about me doing nothing for the first week as he’ll show me everything at the start of next week.
14th July 2020
Following up on my previous entry. I feared an irrational response from the hosts.
They came back after shopping and went into an insane rant about me leaving a gate open – of which I intentionally left open to continue working after grabbing a glass of water.
They screamed about the lack of work I’d done and that I’d just been eating their food.
I’ve removed myself from them, so that I could write in my journal and calm my anger.
I was already thinking of leaving, and this might be the decider. I’m going to carry on cutting the hedges and calm down further in an attempt to have a civilised conversation of which I am in control of.
There may be another volunteer coming, and it’s less than a week until they go on holiday, so I can probably just hold out and enjoy a house to myself and a city to explore.
15th July 2020
I feel tired again today.
It doesn’t help that I stayed up after midnight to finish my YouTube video, but I don’t think that’s the only problem. I seem completely tired all the time. I’m starting to think my weight has something to do with my energy levels.
After a civilised conversation with the host, we managed to organise a routine and real tasks that can be completed.
The new volunteer arrives on Friday and I’m going on a walking tour today, so hopefully I’ll have some friends to hang out with.
16th July 2020
I watched a film last night by an upcoming film-maker from Vienna. It was a documentary about Couchsurfing. It was a nice touch of inspiration. The film was good, although I watch these things every day for free on YouTube.
I found it more inspiring meeting the man behind the documentary and that he could make money from this kind of thing.
17th July 2020
The more I live in this house, the more strange sexual innuendos I see.
They have a few stuffed animals, one of them being a fox. It is wearing what I though to be a normal tiara, and it is, but it’s also decorated with dildos.
I’m not offended enough to say anything, but I do consider the humiliation of the spirit’s carcass.
Hmm.
The hosts took me out for dinner last night and bought me schnitzel, which was nice – the food and the gesture.
20th July 2020
The last few days have felt really busy.
Zsòfi the new volunteer arrived and the hosts threw a house party on Saturday for one of their old orchestra members.
We finally harvested the honey which was awesome.
Jihye, a South Korean girl from the party invited Zsòfi and I to visit Cospudener beach or Cossi for short.
Swimming in the lake with the sunset’s reflection on the water’s surface was amazing.
We bought some hot dogs, though a real dog stole one my sausages.
Laura has been sending me some crazy amazing pictures of England and I question if I left too quickly… I don’t think so. I’m here now and I’m even thinking of going to Thailand once the hosts return from vacation.
Once the sun had set, we rode home, but decided to sit by one of the canals a little longer. Zsòfi has similar thoughts on her mind about the actual requirement for a volunteer once the hosts return from their holiday, so it was nice to be reassured I wasn’t just insolent.
Whilst we were talking we heard a lot of rustling in the bushes across the canal. I shone my torch in the direction of the rustling, and about four pairs of eyes were all looking back as us. Truly amazing. I’d only ever seen that stuff in Scooby Doo. They turned out to be raccoons after listening to their chittering.
22nd July 2020
The hosts left early this morning.
It feels a lot more freeing having the house to just Zsòfi and I.
24th July 2020
Zsòfi and I went out last night.
Firstly we went to a restaurant/bar to meet a group of people from a Couchsurfing event.
We had a couple of drinks and some general chitchat.
The restaurant was vegan, and I wanted food, so we left for a Turkish restaurant that Jihye had recommended. I had the mixed grill – it was nice, but it didn’t beat my local Turkish in London (Sorry Jihye, if you read this…)
25th July 2020
I completely broke my routine this morning.
I rolled over and check my phone messages. One of them was fairly annoying and it put me a bad mood for most of today.
I’m still unsure where I want to go or what work I want to do once the hosts return. I guess I should live more in the moment as there is still much of Leipzig to see.
26th July 2020
I bought a new journal as I’m almost out of space.
We went to the lake again yesterday. The sunsets are amazing, especially swimming in the water’s reflection of the sun.
27th July 2020
I haven’t been in a very good mood for the last few days, however I felt a shift in energy today – even though I had a few drinks last night.
Actually, I really needed last night. A good social gathering.
I haven’t had a gathering since before corona.
Ah. Corona. I struggle to talk to anyone about the lies and agendas behind it, so I try keep my mouth shut about the topic.
We also went church yesterday morning so that Zsòfi could hear the choir sing. Then we went to a flea market.
I don’t understand the appeal behind flea markets. It’s like a fancy car boot sale. It’s just a bunch of shit really. In my opinion.
28th July 2020
I can feel my mind and body repairing itself. I didn’t realise how badly I’d let myself go.
I know I only weighed 60kg before leaving the UK, but I didn’t know that being underweight could affect your fatigue levels the way it did mine.
I just had the motivation to do a small workout and I just need to keep up this consistency.
31st July 2020
The last page of my journal. I wasn’t sure I’d complete it when I first started journaling, but it has been a huge benefit to my life.
Tonight is bulgogi night. Jihye is cooking for us. We are also making some vegetarian dumplings.
I need to start looking for a new Workaway as the 6th August is fast approaching.
1st August 2020
I’m writing in my new journal for the first time today. It souds strange, but it’s kinda exciting.
What stories await?
I have also arranged a workaway in the north of Sweden, helping with the huskies.
I laugh at the thought, because all my thoughts and ideas were to retreat to a tropical island and see out the world pandemic with sunshine and cocktails.
Although I’m going to probably going to one of the coldest places I could have gone.
I even had an opportunity in Costa Rica, but it was just looking after children and I’m looking to get fit again through natural hard work.
I plan to leave on the 6th August, so I’ll enjoy the sunshine whilst I have it.
2nd August 2020
I have to pack today, so I really made yesterday an action packed day.
In the morning we took a kayak through Leipzig’s canals.
In the afternoon I went to an overcrowded lake (Cossi). Though it was nice drinking beer in the sunshine with music and watching the volleyball.
In the evening we went to a techno event with Alex and her friends. Even Matej joined us for a time.
Reflecting on my time in Leipzig.
Leipzig is a strange, yet cool and vibrant city.
It still has communist architecture in places and everyone is a “free spirit” living as non-conformists, against capitalism, yet still living exactly capitalist.
You can ride everywhere which is nice and activities like kayaking are so cheap. You can live a really healthy life.
The street art is also phenomenal, as is Völkerschlachtdenkmal, the monument to the battle of the nations – though they are in slightly different leagues.
I wouldn’t choose to settle here though. Maybe in my young years, sure. There’s a really young population here.
I also probably wouldn’t go out my way to visit Leipzig unless I had friends to visit or something along those lines, an event or whatnot.
Then again, I’m not that into classical music and Leipzig is huge about music, with people like Wagner and Bach performing and composing here.
The hosts – a gay couple – really tried to welcome me with open arms, starting with a barbeque for dinner on my first night
The room is neat and tidy. I have my own shower and plenty of space.
It’s been an interesting experience, living with a gay couple, really due to my lack of experience spending time with gay people in general.
The circles of friends, characters, personalities – it’s truly a different perspective.
Though admittedly, nothing too abnormal from my understandings of the average gay couple already.
My time here has also reinforced my beliefs of routine and structure – I have a draft article on routine, which will join the wellbeing section when completed.
It was a struggle to be productive at first. I think I was extremely underweight actually. I was weighing only 60kg before I flew to Hamburg.
My energy levels were persistently low, which meant a lack of motivation.
We had a small argument about work and completing tasks about a week after I arrived, and I think a combination of my low energy levels and a lack of organisation from their side caused the conflict.
But we created a morning routine and things improved.
It was great to have another volunteer here too, otherwise, the house could have been pretty lonely.
Zsòfi has been nice to hang out with in and out of the house.
Actually my energy levels rose drastically around the time she arrived, so that could also have had an impact on my wellbeing.
We helped with a few tasks involving the maintenance of the bee hives. I finally had the opportunity to see how honey harvesting happens and the raw honey is incredible.
I will 99% have my own apiary later in life.
We also made lunch almost entirely from the garden one of the days. We only added salmon from the market to our egg salad.
Being able to do this made me think more about including a vegetable/fruit garden in my future plans.
When the hosts left, we decided to split the morning tasks into gardening and animal care.
One day I would feed the cats, fish, chickens and turkeys and the next day I would water the garden.
We also went to the lakes several times, cooked together, went shopping together, kayaking, attended a church sermon and went to a techno event.
And we even recorded a podcast together today with John on Zoom.
It took a couple of weeks to really make any headway with people to hang out with. I think I could have been more aggressive in my approach to make friends, but it is what it is.
I’ve met some cool people since, from going on the walking tour and meeting Matej the tour-guide, Chris the film-maker, and through Chris I met Alex who works in a hospital and she took us out a hummus bar the other evening and to the techno event last night.
Bulgogi and dumplings at Jihye’s was great. Jihye is South Korean, living in Leipzing and playing the viola for an orchestra.
We got on really well from the off and we actually spent a fair amount of time together at the lakes.
I also met a couple of people on Couchsurfing, spending some time with a Slovenian girl called Ondina.
As I mentioned, I found it quite tough to meet people at first and my motivation to go out sucked, so I downloaded Tinder and I had a really cool evening on Sachsenbrücke Leipzig with Michelle and her friends.
I mentioned in my July Newsletter, about how productive I’ve been since leaving home. It’s amazing really what happens if you change your surroundings.
Speaking of surroundings… I’m leaving Leipzig tomorrow.
I’ve had a great time in Leipzig, but the hosts don’t live the life that I personally see myself living and so I don’t see growth in the direction that I wish to grow.
They live with constant highs, in a seeming attempt to drown out the shit in the world, instead of accepting it. It’s fair. It’s what I used to do and what many others do.
Though I accept it now, and live far more positively and healthier – although I had to go through a huge rollercoaster of physical and mental health on the journey to this understanding.
That way of life has a way of disguising emotions. For example giving away material items is the highest level of friendliness. Which it is of course friendly. Though, it’s also a way of being friendly without emotions.
My ex-manager and good friend Dave was the same when I worked with him in the Insurance company. Buying me a coffee, smoothie or asking me to place a bet on the horses for him whilst giving me an extra tenner for myself. It’s friendly, but it’s easy. It’s not a true emotion of unconditional love, of giving. It’s almost like buying respect.
I also became the same. I could give things away and feel good, whilst not being emotionally attached allowing myself to move on, take advantage or even backstab without remorse.
As I said. I strive for a different future.
So, I’ll be a taking four different methods of transportation over three days to reach a small village in the North of Sweden.
The reason why I’m leaving tomorrow instead of the 6th August is because there is just one blablacar this week and it’s tomorrow, which really makes a significant difference in travel costs in comparison to trains and busses.
I’ll be looking after a whole litter of husky puppies. I think I’m going to have a crazy time, but that is enough for now. I will probably make you jealous on Instagram with a hundred pictures of little balls of fluffiness before I write again.
Have fun peeps!
